In the past, being a feminist meant equal rights for men and women. I understood it to stand for equal opportunity, being strong in the workplace and self sufficient all the while still celebrating being feminine. Todays feminists seem to be all about hating men.

The Golden Girls had several episodes about being strong women.  The girls are doing fine as singles, but still find the need for men in their lives. In one episode Dorothy and Rose decide, after seeing the cost estimates, to install a toilet. The plumber that delivers the toilet tells them that they can’t do it. He says ” you need training, experience…you have to be a man!” He stated ” you’re  going through your feminist stage awfully late in life.”  Being from a different generation, Sophia agrees with the plumber.

Thinking about that episode and others that involve jobs, artificial insemination, remodeling the garage and voting I see how feminism has changed over the years and can honestly say that by todays standards I am not a feminist.

Yes, I believe in equal rights. I believe that women should have an equal voice, but I also believe that God created men and women to compliment each other not to compete.

Watching the protests and such about job equality I often have to chuckle. Women today only seem to want equal job status if the job is in a nice office and they get to be the boss. I never see women lining up for other male dominated jobs such as construction, garbage men, mechanics, plumbers etc… Yes, there are women in these positions but I don’t see them being supported or even mentioned by the loudest pink hat wearing feminists.

What I like about watching the Girls over new shows about women is that they celebrate being strong, independent single women without vile language and man bashing. They often talk about the men in their lives while simultaneously supporting themselves and standing up for causes that they believe in.

Personally, I love having a man in my life, I always have. As Rose said in an episode about a burglary, ” It’s better with men, not once when I was with Charlie did I get robbed or murdered.” Dorothy, of course,  disagrees with her saying that you could have easily been robbed or murdered with Charles in the house. Yes, she is right, but I have to agree with Rose on this one. I do feel safer with my husband in the house.

Regardless of what the modern feminists say, men and women are wired differently. Not all men, but most that I know, are natural protectors and they tend to think more logically under pressure. Yes, there are women that are calm in stressful situations, I tend to be one. I don’t panic, but I sure do chew my lip and silently worry.

No, this post is not being written to bash feminists or women that are happy without a man in their life. I am just not one of those women. I love having an “old fashioned marriage”. I enjoy the fact that my husband opens my car door, lets me go first and always helps with heavy lifting and such.  He leaves every week to a job that entails long hours, eating cold sandwiches in the truck and sleeping alone in hotels.  It’s not the most glamorous job, but it pays the bills and affords me the ability to stay home.  I enjoy staying home and I keep things running here, so that his time off is just that “time off”.

I am sure that there are many that disagree with my thinking. I always hear women bashing their husbands. I find that a bit odd. Why did you marry him if he’s so awful? I really don’t even get it when some bash their ex’s. Just get over it and on with it.  I read once that the opposite of love is indifference. If you spend time hating someone, you still have feelings for them and that takes time away from loving those currently in your life. It can also give you peace of mind and maybe get rid of some stress. I have tried, since divorcing my first husband, to never speak badly of him, especially around my children. He is actually a nice person. We had some differences, are no longer together and I think that we are both happier now. The fact that we share three very outstanding children and a grandchild is enough to say that it was a good chapter in my life, but one that is closed…but I digress

Now, back to feminism. I can proudly say that I am not one. Yes, I am thankful to the suffragettes that fought for my right to vote and for the women that forged a path for women in the military and to those that demanded “equal pay for equal work”.  But, all in all I love being “just a housewife”. I enjoy the fact that I was given the opportunity to go to college and work outside of the home and drive a car. My mother didn’t go past the 10th grade and didn’t drive until after she was married and had children. It was a different place and time and I am sure that I wouldn’t have liked it. As the Virginia Slims ad used to say ” You’ve come a long way baby”.  Yes, we have come a long way, but, for me, I’ve come far enough. I don’t need to wear a pink hat, use curse words or show my breasts to prove that I am a strong woman.

Thanks for listening!

Thank You for Being a Friend

MG